NagMummy

M has now attended 3 months of the half-day programme and 3+ months of the full-day programme at Schoolhouse by the garden. With the exception that she’s falling sick more often, we are happy with the school so far. The class size has grown from 8 in Dec 2008 to 12 now. With two teachers, one local English teacher and one PRC Chinese teacher, class management still seems manageable.

Just a couple weeks back, we met up with the teachers during the annual Meet-the-Parents session and were presented with an evaluation of M’s developmental progress. One observation shared by the teachers is M’s positive learning attitude. She’s always keen on hands-on activities and very attentive during story telling sessions. However, both noted that she’s always distracted during flashcard sessions. Oops! I wonder if I caused that with all the Glenn Doman flashcards when she was younger.

According to the teachers, M is also generally cooperative and very aware of the good behaviour that is expected of her. For example, she’ll say “Teacher M, I never run”. With regards to interaction with her peers, she’s willing to share toys but does not like anyone to touch her bedding items. As for her likes and dislikes, she loves getting her hands dirty during arts and craft and cookery classes but dislikes rough play and getting water in her eyes during water play.

We’re happy with her development so far and we continue to like the school environment and community. The management updates parents with monthly newsletters, each term’s curriculum and documentation of class activities. M has been happy with school except for a short period of time when she had a change of teacher.

All in all, a good 6 months and its a thumb’s up for us!

That’s the question I’ve been asking myself almost on a daily basis now. We started M on the full-day programme at Schoolhouse by the Garden in March when I had my surgery and it’s coming to 2 months. I feel about 80% now and I believe another month should be enough for me to feel 100%, or maybe 95%.

Question now is do we switch M back to the half-day programme after that? That was our original plan. But she seems so well-adjusted to the full-day programme that I wonder if she would display any resistance to the switch. One other big consideration is of course, cost. Since I’m not a working mum, I am not entitled to the $300 childcare subsidy offered by MCYS to working mums. Our subsidy is capped at $150 and the full-day programme costs us $680 a month.

That leads us to the next question – Should I get a job so we qualify for that $300 subsidy? This is a much harder question to answer. Depending on the nature of the job, there is bound to be logistical issues we need to iron out. Although one would only need to work 56 hours to qualify as a working mum under MCYS’s regulation, such jobs are hard to come by. Somehow, Singapore has just not caught on in the aspect of flexible work and job sharing. Most jobs I would consider are still offered on a full-time basis – about 160 hours a month (assume 8 hours a day and 20 working days a month).

Friends have suggested I be a property agent, insurance agent or financial advisor, tuition teacher or even cashier or sales staff at retail or F&B stores. I’m really not sure. I really enjoy the luxury of time I have currently. M can take forever to get ready for school on some days and I can afford to be patient in coaxing her because I’m not rushing for work. Then in the afternoons, I can pick her up as early as 4.30pm so we still have some time together before dinner preparations and we do not need to rush through the evenings.

Ultimately, most pin it down to money – Can we afford this lifestyle? Because time is really money!

According to Dictionary.com, the meaning of discrimination is as follows:

“treatment or consideration of, or making a distinction in favor of or against, a person or thing based on the group, class, or category to which that person or thing belongs rather than on individual merit”

A person can be discriminated against his/her age, gender, race etc. As a SAHM (aka non-working mother), I belong to a minority group of mothers who can’t help feeling discriminated against sometimes. Other than disapproval from those who believe we should be contributing to the economy, we’re also disadvantaged with regards to government subsidy and tax rebates.

Take child care subsidy for example. Non-working and working mothers enjoy equal subsidy of $150 for half-day programmes. However, for full-day programmes, working mothers enjoy a subsidy of $300 while the subsidy is capped at $150 for non-working mothers. Why? The answer from the MCYS website as follows:

“The main intent of the child care subsidy is to support mothers who need to put their children in child care centres as they continue to work. If a mother is not working, she is encouraged to be the main caregiver, and attendance at child care centres would be supplementary. Hence she is entitled to a smaller subsidy.”

Well honestly, I do not disagree with the answer given. After all, that’s what I’ve been doing for the past 3 years – being M’s primary caregiver. But as we make plans for a second child, we realise how the above answer does not address needs of SAHMs with more than one kid.

One must work 56 hours a month to qualify as a working mother. That’s around 3 hours a day, given a 20-day work month. Doesn’t sound that bad right?

Guess that’s the whole intent. To drive us back into the work force.

There we go again… GDP still has precedence over birth rate…

Last Thursday was supposed to be M’s last class at Little Neuro Tree. We had to miss it because of a less-than-cooperative M and the lack of taxis in rainy weather. M kept refusing to get changed and when she finally did, I failed to get a taxi. It was difficult getting through phone lines and assignment of taxi took forever. After trying 2 taxi companies, I gave up to save us a wasted trip.

Thinking back just nine months ago when we first signed up for the course, she was always so excited to go for class. These days, I usually have to coerce her to get ready for the class. During class, she is fidgety during the flash card and counting sessions and tend to want to spend longer time in specific activities like pretend play. As a matter of fact, a few other kids who started around the same time as us also seemed to have been losing interest in class.

Hence, we decided we’ve discontinue classes after December because I think we’ve gotten enough out of the programme and probably reached “a point beyond which each additional unit of the variable input yields smaller and smaller increases in outputs”, to quote Wikipedia on the definition of the economics law of diminishing marginal returns.

Nonetheless, I think we’ve benefitted and enjoyed the nine months we’ve been there. I see how M can now concentrate during the memory games and get them more and more often. The activities in class also provided me ideas of what we can do together at home. As usual, it provided us a chance to learn together, like the Japanese songs.

Overall, I would say the programme has a bit of everything for everyone, from brain stimulation to phonics to math to music and movement etc. But because of this, the amount of time they can spend on each segment can be very short. Given that M now spends half-a-day five days a week in a pre-nursery programme, I feel there will be a fair amount of overlap in activities.

At the same time, M is approaching her 3rd birthday very soon and that is when the human brain starts shifting from being right-brain dominant to left-brain dominant, more details in my earlier post. I suspect the methods of learning will also need to be more hands on, more exploration in nature. Getting them to sit behind a desk for an hour will likely get increasing challenging.

Well, in truth, there’re so many other interesting courses out there that I’ll like M to try out so it’s time to move on!

M started half-day childcare at Schoolhouse by the Garden this Monday. I was allowed to stay in the centre for 3 days to ease her in, which I did. And so far so good. She visited the school once and has been excited about starting school. To prepare her for school, I’ve been reading the above book for the past 2 months. And every time we pass by a childcare centre, I’ll point out that all the children are without mummies and follow their teachers’ instructions.

On her first day, we arrived in time for breakfast and I sat behind her while she eat her cornflakes. She was probably a little unsure and looked back at me a few times. After that, the teachers brought the children to a play corner with blocks and cooking toys. M got excited and I decided to make a quick exit, said goodbye and went out of eye-shot. I hanged around for the rest of the morning, taking peeps from time to time. After her lunch, I asked her if she wants to pee and brought her to the toilet. As I wasn’t sure if she’ll tell her teachers when she needs to pee, she wore diaper that day. Overall, she did well.

On Tuesday, they had water play and M joined in. But when she got splashed water in her face, she cried. I went to take a look while the teacher was undressing her to give her a quick shower. After the shower, she was crying “mummy carry…” so I helped to dress her. She calmed down when she started to play with the toys. She did not eat much for lunch so I went into the kitchen to feed her and she finished one bowl.

On Wednesday, I sat outside the centre mostly. I informed the teachers that she’s not wearing diaper so they’ll have to remind her to toilet. Around 10+, I heard M crying “mummy carry… i want to go…”. It went on for a long while, I was very tempted to have a look but held myself back. I heard one teacher trying to pacify her but she continued wailing, lasting about 30 min, until lunch time. I found out later that one boy had hit M’s head with the bubble stick and she retaliated by scratching his face. The teacher told her off and she started to cry. Cavemen!

We did not go yesterday as she had lessons at Little Neuro Tree. So, today was her real test. We were actually quite nervous! I left after her teacher carried her into the kitchen for breakfast. She wined a little but did not cry. I said goodbye and made a quick exit. I jumped when my phone rang around 10. Haha… it was mum! And when I picked her up at 12.30pm, she was happily playing blocks with 2 other girls. Her teacher said she did not cry and everything went well.

I’m most surprised seeing how she enjoys playing with other kids. Even though she plays with cousin S very often, M has never played so readily with other kids. She’s diaper free in school too! She’s usually reluctant to use toilets outside home. And she seems to be enjoying herself, telling us what she did in school and looking forward to school.

As for me, I miss seeing how she reacts to different situations, which I could in accompanied lessons. But I got a few hours of free time this morning in return. Not a bad deal at all. I guess it’s time to let go…

11 December 2009 – Megan’s Independence Day!

Today is the M’s last day at GUG (Growing Up Gifted) United Square. We have been attending this once-a-week 2–hour playgroup class (for children from 18 to 30 months) since the start of the year. One of the main reason we chose this programme then was that it was parent-accompanied.

At GUG – a kindergarten with programmes for children from 8 months old to 6 years old (K2), children above 2.5 years old can progress to the next stage of independent classes. But since we’ve decided to start M on half-day childcare soon, she won’t be moving on to that next stage, at least for now.

Nonetheless, we are happy to say that we’ve enjoyed ourselves over the past 9 months. It certainly provided me bits of ‘social life’. Being in the class meant we can discuss events that happen during class after that, like “remember what we did for project yesterday?”. And one of the things I really like is I can sing all the songs she learns in class. They always come in handy when we’re in the car, because M can be quite a ‘monkey’.

M has also learnt the sounds of all 26 letters of the alphabet. GUG adopts the Zoo-phonics system of teaching phonics where each letter of the alphabet is associated with an animal and an action. For example, if she see the letter ‘i’, she would sometimes point to it and say “inny inchworm, e e e” while bending her index finger. Although she still gets some of the actions or sounds mixed up sometimes, it’s a big achievement already in my opinion.

Besides a segment on phonics, each 2-hour class includes music and movement, a 20-min Chinese segment, art and craft or science project and of course a break for snack. Even though all kids are accompanied, there are 2 teachers (and 3 during the chinese segment) taking turns to conduct the class (max 12 kids) and control the kids. A good ratio, I think.

But of course with kids in this age group, the class can get noisy and even chaotic at times. And I must say the teachers have shown their professionalism in dealing with these challenging times. I also find that most of the teachers have a good command of English (or Chinese) and are able to manage the kids well. They also seem to be young (in their 20s and 30s) and genuine. I believe this has led me to have a preference for younger teachers as mentioned in an another post about choosing a childcare centre for M.

So thanks Teacher Az, Teacher Aida, Teacher Siva and Lao Shi! We had fun

p/s: The photo above was taken during the Children’s Day celebration last week.

Before I elaborate further on our final choice of childcare centre, let me just a few points on our eventual decision on a childcare centre over a kindy for M – which I briefly discussed in my previous post.

1) Half-day ‘freedom’. After 2.5 years of staying home with M, I do hope to get some time off finally to explore my own interests! If she goes to a regular kindy, I would prefer to cook her lunch and that will definitely ‘eat’ into my ‘freedom’ time.

2) Given the above point, I hope we can reduce the frequency we go over to my mum’s place for dinner (currently 5 days a week) to perhaps 2-3 days a week. Which of course means I’ll be cooking dinner!

3) One big plus point about childcare centres is they do not have term breaks like the kindergartens! I can imagine how ‘disruptive’ that can be for my ‘freedom’ plans.

4) Alternative care for my absence and recovery for my impending surgery. (This will need a separate post…)

So… Before we set out to visit the childcare centres we shortlisted, here’s my wish list:

1) No air-conditioning: Besides preventing the rapid spread of diseases, M has been living without it in the day so I thought it might be better to stay this way.

2) Private outdoor play area: Since we live in a high-rise HDB flat, M’s contact with nature has been somewhat limited so it’ll nice to let her explore the outdoors in a secure and safe environment.

3) No computers: This is one area I do not see a need for a headstart in life.

4) Clean, organised and pleasant environment: Almost a must-have, especially for young children.

5) Good curriculum: I hope I do not need to send M for ‘Primary 1 Preparedness’ classes in a few years’ time! But I think this is an extremely difficult area to assess, especially for non-teaching professional me. Anyway, I went to a bookstore to have a look at some P1 assessment books to get an idea of what the kids should know and got quite a shock – a ‘challenging’ maths assessment book! Do they really need this???

6) Good teachers: Another subjective area. After all, what is good varies from person to person. Besides passion and dedication which all centres claim their teachers have, I have a slight preference for younger teachers. Maybe it’s their energy level and ‘innocence’.

7) Hearty meals: An area I feel we have least control, it almost feels like ‘take it or leave it’. So I’ll be looking for balanced meals and nothing more.

Sufficient time for play: M is the sort that requires a lot of time to play and explore. So I definitely hope for each activity for be assigned enough time so she does not need to be rushed between activities.

Admittedly, there are some things which may be more easily assessed (physical environment) than others (teachers) and even then, one or two visits may not result in an accurate assessment.

Anyway, if you’re interested to read on, here’s a quick account of all the centres (Serangoon North area) we visited (and tried to visit).

Cambridge Child Development Centre (Poh Huat Cres): The asst. supervisor brought us around on a quick tour of the place, no presentation of timetable, meals or curriculum. No air-conditioning. Place seems noisy, perhaps it’s the traffic from the major road next to it. We heard one teacher screaming ‘SIT DOWN’ at the kids. Reasonable outdoor play area. Incidentally, I had read quite a few good comments about this centre so wasn’t sure if what we saw was a true reflection of the place.

School House by the Garden (Philips Ave): Non air-conditioned common areas (living room, dining area, bathrooms) with air-conditioned classrooms. As their website described, a ‘tranquil’ environment with a one-way road in front. Reasonable outdoor play area – a permanent wall for ‘graffiti’ and saw a  tortoise and some small plants. Teacher who brought us around took her time to explain timetable, meals, curriculum. Teachers came across sincere and children contented. (Felt good leaving the place – must be the air of my childhood! My Primary School (which has closed down) is just around the corner.

Treasure Box (Parry Ave): Called 3 times between me and Matt but was not able to reach Principle who shuttles between centres. Refused to provide mobile number. Gave a final call when we left School House by the Garden but staff insists no visit without appointment with principle. Did not take down our contacts in those 4 calls. Anyway, place looks to be fully air-conditioned (closed doors and windows), we could not even take a peek into the house. No staff or children in sight. Outdoor play area seems reasonable. Put off by attitude of staff. Dropped from our list.

Preschool by-the-Park (Li Hwan View): Before we entered the place, we were already ‘awed’ by the property – a huge three-storey detached house with a swimming pool. Staff who took my call and brought me around was very professional – agreeing to show us around even though they do not even have an available place at the moment. Air-conditioned classrooms. Quite an international crowd – with expat kids. Brief presentation of timetable. Curriculum includes Kindermusik and offers enrichment programmes like violin and swimming classes. Pretty impressive outdoor play area (which comes at a price of course). Put M on their waiting list.

Preschool by-the-Park (Carmichael Rd): We were referred here by the staff from their Li Hwan centre. Principle brought us around, came across experienced, took time to explain their objectives and approach. Air-conditioning in classrooms not switched on. Ceiling fans in classrooms seemed to cause lighting to flicker. Quite an old property, will do good with some sprucing up. Met two Filipino teachers attending to the younger kids. Don’t mean to discriminate but I’m not too sure about M acquiring an Filipino-American accent. Distance from our place a little too far.

It’s not difficult guessing what’s our final choice. Crossing our fingers it’ll work out for M!

Now that M is 2.5 years old, she is beginning to show more willingness to play with other children. Hence, we feel she might be ready for independent classes. The obvious choices we have are the Playgroup (or Pre-Nursery or Nursery 1 – N1) programmes offered by kindergartens (governed by MOE) or childcare centres (governed by MCYS). It’s interesting that the ‘market leader’ in kindergarten education – PCF – offers this programme only in selected centres.

After studying the lists available from the two ministries, we confirmed our observation that there are more childcare centres than kindergartens around our place. Childcare centres generally offer full- or half-day services. On top of the ‘school’ portion, they throw in meals and child minding services. Even before the start of our search, this was already my preferred choice, since it would free up more time for me. But cost wise, it seems more pricey than kindergartens, mainly because we are looking at half-day care. We visited four centres and our top choice costs $410  per month after a $150 subsidy for their half day service (8.30am – 12.30pm).

As for kindergartens, those we sampled were 3-hour (eg. 8.30am – 11.30am) in duration. Because it was my less preferred choice and there was only one nearby that we liked, we did not visit it in the end. However, we did find out that it costs $216 per month, based on a 10-week term of $540. (Note: none of the PCF kindergartens in our area offer N1.)

After some consideration, we decided we’ll just go with the childcare centre and see how things turn out. Being relieved of taking care of M for half a day (including cooking lunch) will open up so much more opportunities for me to explore.

And hence, our search is officially over (I hope)!

The experience at Little Neuro Tree turned out pretty well so far. M enjoys her classes and looks forward to it every week. Each 1-hour lesson is so packed with activities that I sometimes find it a tad too intensive.

One good thing is that I’ve managed to restart the flashcards at home although I’m doing it quite randomly now (whenever I remember and feel like). The advantage of  flashing the cards in class is the kids (maximum of 6) are all seated with parents behind them and the teacher in front across the table. At home, M is always trying to snatch the cards away from me but she is usually one of the most attentive in class!

Each class typically also includes songs, memory games, activities for training fine motor skills, pretend play, learning about concepts like fast and slow etc. Hence, the pace of the class can be quite fast – good for kids who are easily distracted but not so good for kids like M who often need more time. I try to replicate some activities (putting beads through a wire, tearing and cutting paper) at home so she can take her own sweet time.

I definitely agree the class is not just for M. As a parent, I also get to learn about how to introduce some concepts to M and different games we can play with them at home. It’s true that some activities and concepts are covered in any typical playgroup curriculum. But parental involvement and 1-to-1 attention can enhance the learning experience.

It’s also true this once-a-week class don’t come cheap (to us). Come to think of it, we may never know if we are fools for spending this money

So we did sign up for the programme after the talk (if you read my previous post). In fact, we are about to start our second term (12 weeks) with them. Anyway, here’s our journey so far…

I started reading up on Glenn Doman’s books first (when M was around 1 year old), starting with ‘How to teach your baby to read’ and ‘How to teach your baby Math’ and so on. I became aware of The Shichida Method around the same time. As there were no readily available reading material here, I ordered three of his books from Japan.

The power of the right brain amazed me enough to want to experiment on M. But I did not want to spend too much money such that my expectations will become unrealistically high. So I decided to go with the home-based Glenn Doman method. We first bought the English set from GD Baby. By the time I got started, M was 14 months and almost walking.

Not exactly the ideal time to start, but anyway I tried to flash the cards when she was ‘confined’, like when she’s on the potty or in the high-chair. Soon after, I started the Glenn Doman Math set but this time we bought the kit direct from US instead because it was a more basic set and cheaper even after shipping cost. M was not always interested in the cards, crawling away quite often.

I continued with the cards anyway. But as M was very easily distracted, I find myself flashing less cards and also less frequently. Occasionally, I stopped for a couple of weeks before starting again. I do not think we got very far really… definitely not like what others could achieve.

The flashcards slowly became forgotten and I stopped before M turned two. Then recently I was packing the flashcards and though if we should give them another try. Since I haven’t been too successful at home, I thought it could be time to seek some ‘expert’ help. As I’ve read quite a fair bit of negative feedback about the local Shichida franchise, I decided to go for another outfit, Little Neuro Tree. There is a relatively new outlet near our place.

More in my next post…